Minimalist in the making

Spent a lot of time yesterday thinking about minimalism and how to achieve it. Also one of my goals before the baby comes slots very neatly into this theme in the sense of needing to clear the clutter.

I read a great blog called The Happiness Project http://www.happiness-project.com/ which gave me lots of tips and also read a book on simple living by Tammy Strobel called "You can buy happiness and it's cheap: how one woman radically simplified her life and how you can too." Basically the same message was coming through...nobody needs that much stuff to be happy.

So I tackled my kitchen cupboards. What become clear was my clutter wasn't all created by me! I had  3 tea sets given to me by relatives not to mention numerous cake stands and large plates that had been gifted. Other gifts I had chosen myself so I had only myself to blame there. Plus I had things left to me by the previous owner of the flat as a favour. (A.K.A I can't be bothered to pack up my flat properly.) There was even had a large mixer I had won in a raffle. I knew it was time to sort out the cupboard as whenever I opened the door I was confronted by an avalanche of Tupperware.

Gifts then seemed to be my problem. Family things that had either been past on or in some cases cheap tat, but gifts all the same that were  just taking up space. I had to learn to stop feeling sentimental and ungrateful and just get rid. I also remembered that the giving away items to family, my own relatives must have been tinged with relief that the item was gone from their shelves!

Of course the real problems are lurking in the clutter in the bedroom. I am procrastinating like mad as a lot of it is small, insignificant clutter - only worth chucking and that is when the guilt would inevitably return. But it is a matter of reclaiming space and order and piece of mind. So enough of excuses - it must be faced. My job for tomorrow!

Home alone

36 weeks pregnant and the second day of my holiday. It's not officially maternity leave until next week so technically I can just doss about. It's not really in my nature, but I must admit I am now seeing signs of it. Yesterday I wrote a long to do list of jobs that need to be done before the baby and then there are things like housework on top of that and necessary tasks like getting washed and dressed. To be honest I'm not feeling motivated enough to do the latter. It doesn't I feel guilty just very odd. help that the sky is grey and drizzling - not very inspirational. Suddenly the birth seems a long way away again. I don't really have a desire to do anything or see anyone. This is bad!

So what to do next? Finish my cup of tea get off my ass and get in the shower. The only consolation I have is that morning tv is truly dire. Maybe they do it on purpose to motivate the unemployed to get out of the house. It's certainly an incentive not to sit here all day. I guess I need a plan and some structure to my day which the purpose of the list. I hate it when I don't feel I've achieved anything. I had plans for scoping out a new business. Day two and I'm settling for being an earth mother type wearing flowing skirts and sitting around with crystals.

What being pregnant has taught me to appreciate the most is the nature of energy. I realise I had an abundance. I was always on the go and found it hard to sit still. Multi-tasking was my middle name and I did manage to achieve and do a lot of things and visit lots of places. And then it was gone. A small growing baby nicked it and left me sitting like a lump on a sofa realising how fortunate i was to be in this position yet struggling to adjust to the new set of circumstances. Seeing so many things that needed to be done but little inclination to do them. Is this what burn-out feels like? I can't say I feel guilty, just very odd. Will this energy ever come back? I suspect also I'm eating too much sugar so will cut down on that and see if it helps.

Getting rid of the blues

I wake up feeling like a great big blob and in a bad mood. It's 9am and a Saturday. Normally I would get out of bed and start doing things. Tidying, making breakfast planning where I was going to do and who I was going to meet. Today I lie there like some creature that has washed up on the beach and is able to move sufficiently fast enough to drag itself back in the water.

There are only two cures for this state of lethargy which are go back to sleep or reluctantly move my legs until they are hanging over the edge of the bed and my two feet make contact with the floor. Slowly I get dressed now realising that the tips that once covered my expanding belly are now leaving an unsightly gap at the bottom. I have breakfast, sit in front of the tv and then give up and go back to my bed.

The lesson here - if you are pregnant and tired don't bother to fight it. You aren't going to win and it won't be forever. If you are used to being super active accept that for a short period in your life you are going to be lazy. It probably grates against everything you've ever read in terms of making the most of the time you have but if your body says rest you just have to deal with. I have to remember its not forever and hopefully I will have another day tomorrow when I feel better. The willpower I have to muster today is to ignore all the crap in front of me that makes me feel like a prime candidate for a hoarder programme!

The first step to optimism

This blog is about how to be optimistic at a time when life is full uncertainty. It's about trying new things and remaining positive in the face of new challenges. It's written from a woman's perspective as a lot of the self-help gurus I have followed in the past have been men with very different problems and views on life.

I am seven weeks away from giving birth to my first child and am taking a break from my career at the age of 39 without feeling that I have ever achieved a meteoric rise to fame or riches. So now what? What direction shall I go in? Will having a child change me beyond recognition and what happens next? Anything that is unknown is scary at first, it's about finding the courage to keep on in the face of adversity.

So what do I have to help me on this journey? I have a new blog to teach me discipline, commitment and self reflection. I have a list of barely formed, vague goals; a smattering of Neuro linguistic programming and a shelf full of self-help books promising me that I can make my first million and change my life in seven days....

So here goes....